Photo courtesy of liasterkenburgIt was a game of Texas Hold 'em. I was holding a pair of kings. After a fairly uneventful beginning, the flop came. An ace, a king and a queen (not matching colors). I just made trips. I bet, and got raised by one other player. All others had already folded by that point. We raised to the max (4 raises). The next card out was a 7. The one after was a queen. I just made a full house. Me and the other player both bet as much as we could. Then we both showed our cards.
He was holding a pair of aces. I lost.
And you know what? If the next hand I held the same cards, and the same cards came on the table, I would have bet again. And if the hundred next hands looked the same, I would have bet. (okay, if it really happened a hundred times in a row, I would have become suspicious. But you get the point)
Because in poker, you never know what your opponents are holding. You only know your own cards, the cards on the table, and the betting.
You simply have to decide on the best play in a given situation. If the odds are 60-40 in your favor, bet. If your opponent gets lucky, that happens. No need to worry. Your decision to bet was still correct.
So here's the Greatest Life Lesson I learned from playing poker:
In the moment, make the best decision based on your available information. Then forget about it and move on.
Just make the best decision in the moment. Then you have nothing to regret. If it turns out you made a mistake, just treat it as a learning opportunity.
It's the difference between saying:
- "I shouldn't have done that."
- "Next time I will do it differently."
Read those two sentences again, and really understand the different mindset. It's the key to living at peace with your past.
Let's say you decide to cook yourself chicken wings with peanut butter. It seems like a good idea at the time. Then you find out it tastes like crap. No regrets, it seemed like a good idea. So you throw away the food.
Again, no regrets. In the moment, the choice was between eating crappy food or throwing it out. You made the right choice.
And finally, extract the lesson from it. As in "Damn, that was disgusting! I'll never make chicken wings with peanut butter again."
Why I don't play poker anymore
I have a friend who earns his living playing poker. He spends two hours each night playing online poker.
In other words, a 14-hour work week.
When I first heard about it, of course I wanted to be like him. Who wouldn't want to earn a good living in just 14 hours weekly.
But I later realized I don't feel good earning my living like that. Mostly because it's win/lose. In order for me to win, somebody else has to lose.
I have since changed my attitude to earning money. I now focus on one key principle:
Provide value to others.
There's no way you will be poor if you consistently provide value to others. It doesn't matter if you don't immediately see a way to make money from it (like my blog). It will eventually come back to you. Call it karma if you wish.
That being said, I don't regret having played poker. Because at the time, it seemed to be the right decision.
So remember, make the best decision in the moment, and then move on.
12 comments:
I think you've got something here. It's pretty much how I see things, although I've looked at it more in terms of choosing jobs etc. "Do the next thing that seems like a good idea at the time and when you look back on it, it will all seem 'meant'."
I think your way of saying it is snappier, though :)
previous post deleted for horrible spelling error
"Never regret. If it's good, it's wonderful. If it's bad, it's experience." -Victoria Holt
Such wonderful comments, too :). I've never seen that quote before, and I liked the comment about doing what seems like a good idea, and it seeming "meant" afterward :).
I am glad to see I am not alone in deciding not to make a living from poker. A bunch of Swedes and other people making money from poker were trying to convince me to play, figuring I would be good at it. They had good intentions, but eventually I had to explain that I would rather make a living doing constructive things for others.
My experience is that the kinds of people smart enough to make money from poker or financial speculation are always smart enough to be really successful in a lot of other possible fields. I think the best reason for getting into a competitive arena is the chance to learn interesting lessons, like the one you described learning through poker.
One funny concept, though- one of the poker players felt that "taking money from stupid people" was a constructive thing. I give him points for creative self-justification :).
great blog! i know it's new but i hope you keep it up. i've enjyed all of your posts esp. the 'body language basics' one. cheers.
I know you are an atheist, but it might interest you to know that the Gemmara (Jewish Law) says that a gambler is one of those people whose testimony is not accepted in court. Why? Because he makes his living at the expense of others. It's interesting that you picked up on that.
I too played poker on line.(Just for fun) it tied up hours and hours of my day. I've since stopped playing entirely. To much to do and enjoy in life with out spending hours on end on the computer.
I guess I didn't know that you were an Atheist. Very interesting. To early in the day to tackle that subject. Maybe some other time.
I'm signed up on reader for your blog. Would you ever consider an email subscription?
Thank you for the insight.
Michael
i think you stopped playing poker because ur bad at it.
i can tell purely by the fact you play limit, you feeling that losing with a full house to a higher full house is a bad beat, the way u describe the hand, etc. etc. etc.
anyways ur friend probably isn't that good at poker if he just makes a living...most successful players (top 1% and 0.2%) make 5k every sunday alone.
anyways keep practicing
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